Sunday, March 8, 2009

Finding me

Come to me, all you who are troubled and weighted down with care, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke on you and become like me, for I am gentle and without pride, and you will have rest for your souls; For my yoke is good, and the weight I take up is not hard. - Matthew 11: 28 - 30

I have no idea what I think about religion or God or spirituality or any of that. But it's funny that what often gives me comfort are often related to these aspects. This verse came to me the first time at a time in my life when I was really struggling with many aspects. Being a mom, being a wife, being a church youth sponsor, being a daughter... all of these things that I thought people had expectations for what it meant for me to be these things. But what does that even mean? Being worried about what I thought other people thought I should be was such a hard way to live. I was setting myself up to fail and to be continually stressed in a major way. And I was.

The first time I read this verse it was a such a light bulb moment for me. Regardless of what I thought about religion, regardless of what I thought about God, here was this verse reaching out to me, telling me that there was something out there willing to take on some of these burdens that I had taken on myself. It made me realize I was taking on burdens that weren't even really there. It was part of what started the realization that I am a legitimate person as I am. I am an amazing person, talented and smart, energetic and enthusiastic, passionate and caring, selfless and giving... but that it's also fine for me to have the moments when I am selfish and self-absorbed, bitchy and uncaring. It doesn't make me less of positive person that I am the majority of the time if I have the moments of self-doubt and bitchiness.

In some ways all of these things sound horribly conceited, but that's not my intent. Everyone should realize what their strengths are and what makes them the amazing people that they are. We all have different gifts and passions, it's what keeps life interesting. It'd be pretty boring if we were all the same and all liked the same things. I guess this is my way to encourage people to find who they are and love that person.

amor y paz,