Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Unbelievable sadness

You know, it's not like I knew Heath Ledger, like we ever met... but for some reason when I heard about his death today I couldn't help but to feel an overwhelming sadness. He had everything going for him. I saw him in the trailer for The Dark Knight and I was so impressed, such a great career move. A whole new character he can play. I still can't wait to see the movie, but now I can't help but think it's going to be kind of weird.

In the wake of Brad Renfro's death just a few days ago and with my experience with death, I've always seen it in groups of three and I can't help but be saddened to think another young, talented actor/actress could be lost.

This evening I mourn for families that have lost their loved ones unexpectedly and tragically.

amor y paz,


If I'm in a cave, why is it so bright?

So I've had this freaking cold for a little over a week now. I don't have a fever any more, but man am I still feeling seriously crappy. Everything sounds like I'm in a cave, at least in my left ear. It's so annoying because every once in a while I'll get just a little bit dizzy and then feel just weird for a while. Ugh, I'm tired of being sick. It's too damn early in the semester to be having a motivation crisis. *sigh* I'm feeling whiny and moody, that's always a party.

amor y paz,


Tuesday, January 15, 2008

I blame global warming!

No longer do I live in the days when I can count on Northern Indiana being freezing cold and snowy the whole winter long. January started off amazingly mild, like in the 60s mild. What the hell is up with that? I mean seriously, isn't it supposed to stay cold and kill off all of the nasty bugs that wreak havoc on poor unsuspecting me????

So that's what I'm blaming global warming for, my fever and cough, the illness that started with the boy, traveled to number three, then to me and now to the middle one. That is so freaking stupid. I hate being sick. I hate even more that I'm missing class. It's only the second week, seems awfully squander-y of me. Oh well. Here's hoping tomorrow brings a reduction in fever and less of the coughing up of the lungs.

amor y paz y salud,


Thursday, January 10, 2008

Yay! New semester

So far so good on the new semester. My history class... not as good as last semester, but I think it will be ok overall. I can definitely tell a difference in my Spanish classes as well. My comprehension level is so much higher. I'm not dreading lit nearly as much with this discovery. :)

But so far my absolutely favorite class is Flamenco. I'm so excited about this class. The teacher is great, she's really a lot of fun, and it's so amazing to learn a real dance form. So far it's nothing terribly complicated, but I imagine once we start putting things together it will become moreso. And seriously, an excuse to get new shoes and a cool cool skirt???? What more do you need! I'm in Flamenco 1 now and plan to do Flamenco 2, also. Hopefully once I'm all trained I'll be able to find somewhere to do my dance. No matter, it'll be awesome no matter what!

amor y paz,


Wednesday, January 2, 2008

The thin line...

When I was little, I would wonder, when was I going to wake up. I remember thinking, this must all be a dream, my life.. the world.. all of it has to be a dream. In a lot of ways the whole life cycle seemed kind of silly. I just didn't get what the whole point of everything was. I don't think I was an unhappy kid, or depressed or anything like that at all. But I remember very clearly these thoughts.

Now that I'm an adult, sometimes I wonder if I'm sane. Like there is a thin line I'm teetering on, holding onto the tiniest thread keeping me connected to the world and any second I could fall or the string would snap. I have no idea what would happen, just sometimes I feel that way. Blame lack of sleep, PMS, who knows... life is weird... and figuring out my place in it, often feels daunting. I'm certain I have a purpose here, now if I could just figure out what it is.

amor y paz,