Monday, August 8, 2011

A couple of lists...

10 things I hate (in no particular order):
1. crickets - they're loud, 'nuff said;
2. blisters on the bottom of my feet - or anywhere for that matter, but on the bottom of my feet it's particularly annoying since I have to walk on them and all;
3. Mondays - they've been particularly Monday-ish the last couple of weeks, I'm ready for that to stop happening;
4. mushrooms - they're squishy AND they taste gross, quite possibly the world's most disgusting food;
5. squishy foods - as long as we're talking about them, they're gross and they make my face go (o^o) - not at all an accurate portrayal, but if you know me at all, you know the position my face takes when I've eaten something squishy, it's not pretty!;
6. most country music - like the music that you can play backwards and get all of your stuff back, e.g. your truck/girlfriend/dog/double-wide trailer, etc;
7. stupid people - no there is some room for lack of knowledge in certain areas, but stupid people... the ones that you look at or talk to and think, surely it's not possible for one person to be that dense... yeah them, I have no tolerance for those people;
8. humidity - I don't mind heat for the most part, but humidity makes me really, really grumpy, like I want to punch anyone who crosses my path, not that I would, but it's tempting;
9. feeling out of control - I'm kind of a control freak and when I feel like various parts of my life are beyond my control, it makes me very uncomfortable. It's hard to let things go and trust that they will be done to my satisfaction... or at all. I'm working at it and have improved, but I still hate it;
10. I can't think of a tenth one right now, perhaps that's a good thing. :)

10 things I love (in no particular order):
1. my children - they keep me young and challenge me daily to be a better parent and all around good person. They are amazing little people and I love watching who they are becoming and their personalities as they are developing;
2. Samuel Yoder - he loves me for who I am, the good, the bad and the ugly. I haven't scared him off with my craziness. He lets me be me and loves who that person is. He helps me see the good things I am when I am unable to recall them for myself;
3. singing - I'm good at it, I miss doing it;
4. my life - despite the bumps I have experienced, everything that has happened has shaped who I am today. I wouldn't change any of it, even the parts I'm not proud of;
5. family - they are loud, crazy and maybe even overbearing at times, but they're fantastic, and I'm lucky to have them;
6. simplicity - I really am not looking for grand experiences or things in life. I want to enjoy who I am, where I am with the people I love in my life;
7. photography - taking pictures of nature in particular, or catching my children unawares, so that they are being themselves. I'm not particularly savvy in the ways of super quality photography, but taking pictures makes me happy, and often is what I do when I'm feeling particularly down or upset about something;
8. movies - good ones, bad ones, I like watching a variety of film and talking about it with people that have seen the movies as well;
9. crafty stuff - I like making things: crocheting, painting, baking, cooking... I'm not good at all of them, but I enjoy them all and they bring peace to my soul;
10. my job - though it stresses me out, days like today particularly, I truly love my work. When a resident discharges and you can see where they have come from and how much they have grown, it's truly satisfying and fantastic to know that you had a part in that.

I thought I would end with the 10 things I love so that this entry would end on a happy note. Today was an incredibly stressful day. I got off work, ran errands at Target, came home and wanted to ignore the world. It's been good to type this all out. I needed to think about what in my life is important to me, it was therapeutic. I encourage the resident's I work with, especially the ones that struggle with self-harming tendencies, to make a list of the things worth living for, what goals do they have for life, not just to think about them, but actually write them down so that in the dark times, when it's hard to remember what's out there for them, they can read their list and see that they have good things in their lives.

I think this is a good strategy for everyone really. We all have times that are hard, when we can't remember that life is good. So make your list, refer to it often. Write down two things a day to start, if you have trouble thinking of those things that are good. Before you know it, it'll come super easy. I'll step down off of my soap box now.

amor y paz como siempre,

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